It starts with a crash in your garden at one in the morning. A man...not a man, not really...sitting in your crushed hydrangeas with his hands up and his voice too loud, apologising for his parking. He's wearing a body he's owned for less than an hour. He keeps touching his own fingertips like they're miracles. He thinks your wheelchair means he was sent down incomplete. You should be afraid. You're holding a torch like a weapon and your heart is hammering and there is an alien in your flower bed who thinks he got the budget version of being human because nobody gave him wheels. But he's looking at you like you're the most fascinating thing he's ever seen. And when you let him inside...God help you...when you let him inside, he sits on your couch and he can't stop asking questions. He wants to understand human mating. Academically. For science. You offer to demonstrate.

(Heads up: There is a crashing sound at the 00:24 mark)

An Alien Lands in your Garden and gives you a Blow Job_final.mp3